Just some fun shit
August 27th, 2007
What is the most flexible word in English? Why Shit of course.
Shit, BY FAR, the most functional and diverse word in the English language.
We use it in every possible descriptive fashion.
You can get shit-faced, Be shit-out-of-luck, Or have shit for brains. You can smoke shit, find shit, give shit, or take shit.
It can be positive, you can get your shit together, find a place for your shit, or finally shit or get off the pot.
You can buy some cool shit, sell shit, laugh at some funny shit, and sometimes find some shit worth finding.
Sometimes it’s not so good. You can lose shit, step in shit, find yourself in a world of shit, forget shit, sometimes SERIOUS shit. Even accidentally play with some shit that you shouldn’t have, possibly even getting that shit all over ya. Even ocasionally having to eat shit.
We often use it to describe a person. Some people just really know their shit, while others don’t. They are total dipshits, and can’t tell the difference between shit and shineola.
It can identify a persons general characteristics too. Some folks are lucky shits, others dumb shits, and a few crazy shits. Some talk shit constantly, so much that all their friends know what everything that comes out of their mouth is nothing but shit.
Bullshit to be more exact. Or, horse shit, possibly coming from a chicken shit.
You can throw a shit fit, start shit, finish shit, sling shit, catch shit, shoot the shit, or duck when the shit hits the fan.
Maybe you’re a really good person, and seriously give a shit. Helping homeless people, serving shit on a shingle.
Or an awful person, constantly right in the middle of shit. Stirring that shit.
Maybe it’s just a description of your current position in life. Maybe you’re in some really deep shit. Or conversely, happier than a pig in shit.
Could be about the weather. Some days are colder than shit, while others are hotter than shit. Rainy days can be wetter than shit, and if they last a long time, you can just get plain old tired of that shit.
Maybe it’s just plain old shitty day for no reason at all.
Some music sounds like shit, movies often have a shitty ending, and are filled with shitty actors. On occasion, food tastes like shit, your house may look like shit, or your clothing fits like shit. Maybe it’s your hair, and you can’t do shit with it.
Maybe it’s nothing specific, you just woke up this morning feeling like shit.
If you’re moving, you might be packing your shit. Or at least planning that shit. You might need to get a bigger place, after all, you could have waaay too much shit. Or get rid of some shit, so you can live in a nice place, rather than the shithole you live in now.
Maybe you just got out of a bad divorce, and he or she left you with shit. Or, just not enough shit. So you need to go get some new shit. Still could be good, because you might have been seriously tired of their shit.
Sometimes you need to talk about some serious shit, because you just really need to get that shit off your chest.
You can carry shit with you, causing that shit to build up. Till you throw your own shit fit. Maybe you’re dealing with a mountain of shit, or suddenly found yourself up shit creek without a paddle.
Or you feel that sometimes everything you touch turns to shit, or how you wish someone just gave a shit. Then other times you fall in a bucket of shit and come out smelling like a rose. Maybe your life is so good that you’re happier than a pig in shit. Maybe you’re a snob, and your shit doesn’t stink.
The bottom line is clear.
When you stop to consider all the facts, SHIT is the basic building block of the English language.
Just remember, once you know your shit, you really don’t have to take shit from anyone.
Well, Shithead, I just looked at the clock. And Sheeeeeitt, it’s time for me to go.
Sorry to take so much of your time with this long post, but I just wanted you to know that I really do give a shit about you.
I’d wade through a river of shit if you needed me to. 
December 10th, 2007 at 5:23 pm
this wasent fun at all